Thursday, January 9, 2014

Easy

Easy 

Whoever said suicide was the easy way out. 
Those people 
born blessed without 
this chemical malfunction 
that pollutes harmless thoughts 
into venom that blisters 
deep into self made wounds. 

This exhausting battle 
that wages in your head 
and the boiling of your heart. 

Everyday is another fracture for a withering soul. 
Suicide isn’t easy. 
The thought of taking your life 
is the hardest choice. 
Living is easy. 
Defying the natural instinct 
that allows one to see new sunrises 
despite the bleakness of the dark 
and barren wastelands 
born from the ravages of depression.
That’s hard.  

The tortured mind desperately grasping
at the love and strings that connect one to others. 
Today though, I felt the cold coil around my throat 
and it all faded as my mind shouted out for the never ending peace
brought by unseen tears and regret. 

With the first blur of darkening, your face flashes 
despite the words you just left with me. 
Your almost last words.
it gave me a kick back to a life 
where you will not cry for me. 

The question that reminds as I look at my 
instruments for my escape. 
How much longer can I keep this up? 
How much longer can I get the better  

of holding hands with my own personal reapers? 

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