What Comes Down Must Eventually Find a Way Up

What Comes Down Must Eventually Find A Way Up 

Amazing
how much has changed
in almost a month. 

I went from thinking I had the one 
to realizing that I wasn't ready
and neither was she. 

I went to thinking I had the best friend 
in the whole reality
to see that he makes choices 
for his own benefit 
to hid from pain. 

I'm jealous
of those who aren't like. 
Like the many I know 
who are my so called 
"Warning Label People" 

We struggle everyday
and when we trip 
boy, 
do we fall hard. 

A lot of us, kind of get stuck 
either falling forever
or land and believe 
that our spine is broken 
and don't bother to change. 

Me, 
I've got a lot of fight still in me right now. 
Or at least I still believe I do 
despite the heavy chains
that tie to the ones 
that pull me down 
and make me feel 
like the monster I know
I can truly be. 

The weight can be unbearable as 
I am akin to Prometheus 
to be forever chained as 
the vultures of anxiety 
pick away my flesh 
cawing at the black feathered memories
of pain 
loss
and hate. 

I'm not perfect 
and granted I have my scares 
that riddle me below the skin 
I still move 
and climb up that jagged cliff face. 

I can smell a breeze at the top 
and I sometimes see glimpses of her
of them 
the world that only can be born 
with the hands of a stronger
and wiser man 
than the being that I am now, 
a being currently clawing its way out of the past 
and into his future. 

But as I notice that the once jagged cliff
is starting to bloom in the sun 
I think of her 
and that one 
and this one 
and those eyes 
and smiles 
that I have been graced to see 
and I know that I am loved. 

As the vultures come down 
to peck away what they can 
I lift that one hand from the face
and I move on up 
little by little. 

Not to much longer I say 
because my life 
is in sight 
and I'm not going to let you 
pull my heavy chains 
down to you levels.