Nightmares
My nightmares always seem to be
about the same thing.
Over and over again.
It is I,
in this present,
trying to redeem friendships
that I have lost in the past.
When I made some of my most
life changing mistakes,
the revelations that set me down
this long and uphill road,
I take some comfort that they are happy.
Those magnificent people
who were the friends
that inspired me to be strong....
I miss them terribly.
And yes,
I still do have some of those friends
back in the lands of yester years,
when I began my journey in this new found life.
But some memories...
...some moments....
will always make me smile
while at the same time
reminds me of a horrible truth.
That I am a man
who has committed sins
and still must work
on his own self redemption.
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