Had another...

Had Another....

Dream about you. 
Again. 

They happen from time to time. 
Whenever I except how much 
I now fear being intimate 
with most. 

But then I go to sleep with this fear
and I have a dream 
all about being close to you. 

How it was never hard 
to love you. 

It was...just love
it was hard
easy
stressful 
and fun. 

Sometimes
when I look at the knitted memories 
I still carry 
since they no longer hurt me 
or try give me some 
unrequited hope, 
I whisper to myself 
"I love you still." 

Sometimes I wonder
if its just the memory 
or I just still feel 
the connection. 

A shame 
that we may never see each other again 
for I am here
and you are there. 


And for me
I no longer belong there. 

In fact, 
I don't belong in anyone's there.