Haunted

Haunted

It is in this witching hour 
between the twilight of this reality
and the vast void that I would call
"the land of dreams" 
where my brain 
that is so active in its rumblings in the day 
draws a blank 
and smothers all thoughts
 feelings 
and desire 
all in the name of a good night's rest 
from a wild imagination 
that is my burden 
and blessing. 

But I get haunted by the memories 
from days long past 
of conversations that I captured 
to give me strength. 

Now they have turn to heavy chains 
pulling me down 
as the feelings that I have been so easily replaced 
yet again by someone 
who was right there 
at the right time 
to protect you 
from my madness 
and disdain. 

Now it is I 
who wished to keep your promises 
when really it was your promise to me
on a note I saved 
while I was out working in the garden 
tending to clearing the vines
that wrapped tightly around 
my heart. 

Holidays gone past 
and its my fault. 
This thing that is in me 
is a cold fire 
as I can never feel warm 
but all I can see 
is the burn marks 
from the inferno that only I seem to create.